


One More Moment (One More Try)

by tsunderei



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, Misunderstandings, Not Canon Compliant, Pining, Slow Build, They're both dumbass disaster gays, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 08:19:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16530881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsunderei/pseuds/tsunderei
Summary: Lately Kageyama has done everything in his power to make sure he leaves a good impression on Hinata. But he completely forgets to make sure he won’t lose himself in the process.





	One More Moment (One More Try)

**Author's Note:**

> I’m gonna be honest: this is extremely self-indulgent. I set out to write just a university fic but then I thought “hey, how would it play out if I threw some minor time traveling in there?” and one thing led to another and now here we are! This doesn’t feature any time traveling on a grand, global, science-y scale though, it’s kinda laid back that way lol, BUT I hope it’s different and interesting. Most of all I hope you’ll enjoy it! I personally think it turned out pretty alright.

He should’ve worn gloves.

Kageyama tucks his frozen hands into his pockets and sinks deeper into his scarf, his shoulders hunched. Another gust of winter swoops past him and he moves strategically behind a salaryman, letting him act as an unknowing shield. It’s windy this afternoon, the temperature has dropped lower than usual, and the train station he’s currently stuck in is mostly open-air. It’s the kind that never settles on anything in between, it’s either a box of heat in summer or a freezing tunnel in winter. This time it’s the latter. It’s not his favorite place to be right now but he’s left with no choice if he wants to get to his physio appointment on time.

He yawns widely, absently scanning the commuters on the opposite platform. Some are braving the afternoon rush by consulting their phones, some have chosen to retreat sleepily into their coats and hoodies, while others are… Kageyama does a double take, his brain grinding to a halt. The crowd almost disperses for a moment, followed by a second of clarity where his imagination gets way ahead of him. Spring suddenly exists within the span of a flicker, carrying pink petals that are only visible in the blink of an eye before they melt into invisibility.

Kageyama has no idea who the person is. He’s never seen him before, they haven’t even made eye contact - but he can’t help but stare at him shamelessly. He’s carrying two large grocery bags in his arms and is about to board a train, his gaze locked on a spot in the distance. He vanishes in a blur of motion, blending seamlessly into the crowd, swept away by the masses. It takes only a few seconds before he’s gone and Kageyama is still staring after the train, frosty cotton clouds escaping his mouth.

Love at first sight isn’t really a thing; he knows that. Neither is fate, nor destiny, nor anything similarly abstract. He knows that Tokyo consists of millions of people and that the chances of running into the same person twice are rather slim. He knows that some things may be worth the risk, whatever it is. He also knows that what he’s considering right now is a total clash with his personality and unlike anything he would ever do. But there’s always a first time for everything. He knows that, too.

So Kageyama closes his eyes and counts slowly backwards from five. He doesn’t want to go back too far; he just needs enough time to get to the other platform. He’ll probably regret hopping on the wrong train during rush hour and he’s going to be late for his appointment as well, but he’s sure he’ll regret letting go of this opportunity even more. Besides, it’s not like it requires much effort to go back like this. Just a small tweak in the fabric of time to set himself five minutes into the past. That’s plenty enough.

He picks a different escalator the second time around and hurries onto the platform, claiming a spot close to where he spotted the stranger earlier. When he shows up Kageyama recognizes him immediately – downy jacket, brimming grocery bags, a shock of bright, messy hair. He walks by in an almost surreal replay and stops in the exact same place he did five minutes ago.

He looks kind of athletic, at first glance. He carries himself a certain way, with a bounce in his step, like someone who’s in good shape and runs fast. They must be roughly the same age but he’s pretty short, making him look a lot younger than what he probably is. Chaotic tangerine curls frame a perfectly heart-shaped face and the cold wind has been biting into his cheeks, leaving a soft pink blush. After a minute or two he looks up and glances to the side, revealing a pair of honey brown eyes. He briefly meets Kageyama’s gaze, warm brown is locked on icy blue for a few lingering seconds, before he quickly looks away. Kageyama’s heart lurches uncomfortably. He must’ve glared back at him without meaning to.

Once again the train arrives but Kageyama doesn’t get on it, like he first planned. Instead he steps back and watches as the stranger is swallowed by the crowd, in exactly the same way his past self was.

Three minutes later the next train is already coming in and he wonders how to go about this situation in the best way. It’s true that Kageyama doesn’t believe much in love at first sight. But he believes in trying to create good opportunities for himself if he can. He concludes that the best thing he can do at this point is to make sure the guy somehow misses his train.

He closes his eyes again and steadily counts backwards, flat out ignoring the fact that it’s pretty rude (and kind of creepy) to intrude on someone else’s life like this. When he opens his eyes he’s still at the train station, right outside the entrance. He stops, clutches his gym bag in anticipation, and waits for him to show up. Just like earlier he spots him immediately, singling him out in the crowd as if all other faces have been blurred out. They might as well be.

His first attempt fails before it even begins. Kageyama tries to strategically block his way but nerves and bad conscience coil tightly in his stomach, forcing him to chicken out last minute.

“Okay, get it together,” he mutters, exhaling as commuters push past him and the young man’s back disappears into the station with them. “Try again. Go two minutes back.”

Once again Kageyama rewinds, waits for him to show up, and then he puts his all into it, not even hesitating before deliberately cutting right into the stranger’s path. They collide with a lot more force than he intended. The poor guy takes a really bad tumble, hitting the ground with a loud thump, the air audibly knocked out of him while his groceries go flying everywhere. He even drags a couple of innocent pedestrians with him in the fall, knocking them over like dominoes, and in a matter of seconds chaos has erupted in the middle of the street.

Kageyama freezes in sheer panic and stares at the scene he caused. He doesn’t want to hang around this mess if he can undo it – which he can. Without any sort of apology he hurriedly rewinds, braces himself, and then bumps into the guy again. This time the impact is softer, but he suffers another stumbling fall and his grocery bags still take flight, spilling their contents all over the pavement in a comical rerun. Kageyama cringes. He can’t believe he’s right here, consciously doing all of this to someone he doesn’t even know. He must actually be out of his mind.

“Ow, ow, ouch…”

The stranger groans and sits up, rubbing his neck. He looks up and flinches when he sees Kageyama looming over him. Brown eyes stare into his, wide and startled, before slowly narrowing into an accusing frown.

“Watch where you’re going!” he snaps, annoyed. “What are you, a brick wall? Be more careful!”

“I… I’m sorry,” Kageyama manages, finally coming to his senses enough to speak. “Um, are you okay…?”

“Ugh, yeah…” the redhead replies with an unhappy sigh, taking in the sight of all his groceries now spread out all around him. “I think so…”

“I’m really sorry,” Kageyama repeats, his cheeks flooding red. “I didn’t mean to run into you.” _Except I totally did, like three times._

He crouches and reaches for runaway apples and beaten tomatoes in an attempt to hide how hard he’s blushing. He helps him gather the rest of his groceries into his bags and then extends a hand, offering to help him on his feet. The stranger grabs it after a second’s hesitation. Their eyes meet for what seems like the hundredth time in the span of only five minutes and Kageyama thinks this would be a perfect moment for fate to kick in, for love at first sight to make its way out of the movies and into the real world. But instead the young man looks down at his watch, hair falling into his eyes, and Kageyama knows that these budding romantic feelings are only his own. He even went so far as to manipulate time for this guy.

“I missed my train now,” he murmurs. “That’s just great.”

“Ah, yeah… Sorry about that –”

His apology is met with another frown. “Will you stop saying you’re sorry already? What’s done is done so might as well catch the next one. Were you also going on the same train? The one that just left?”

“Huh…? Oh, yeah,” he lies, nodding. “I was.”

“So that makes us even!” the stranger says and smiles so widely Kageyama could’ve sworn he felt an arrow go straight through his heart. “You can carry this for me,” he adds and shoves one of his grocery bags into his arms, “to make up for how gangly and clumsy you are.”

He heads for the escalator before Kageyama can respond, leaving him no choice but to follow. They make it downstairs just as the train sidles up to the platform and the crowd helps them the rest of the way, pushing them into the same carriage.

The situation is a lot more embarrassing than Kageyama expected. He slumps behind the groceries. He supposes they have some sort of bond now, as opposed to being complete strangers. They’re caught in a limbo between casual chat and nothing at all, and both of those options seem equally awkward. Smalltalk isn’t exactly his strong point but not saying anything is just weird. He’s well aware it’ll be a waste of time (literally) if he doesn’t try to engage in conversation at this point, but luckily the redhead speaks again, solving the problem for him.

“So, where you headed?”

It takes a second for Kageyama to realize he’s the one who’s being talked to.

“Um… To practice,” he says, picking the first thing he can think of. It’s not that big of a lie, considering they happen to be on a train going in direction of his university.

“What kind of practice?”

“Volleyball.”

“Wow, really?” The stranger’s eyes immediately gleam with excitement. “That’s so cool! Volleyball’s fun, I love it.” He flashes him another one of those sunshine smiles. “Do you play for a living or something? You’re super tall.”

“Oh - no. It’s nothing like that. It’s just my university team.”

“Is that so? What university do you go to?”

He really is the talkative type and it’s… well, it’s a little overwhelming. Kageyama hesitates, flustered because the redhead has taken such sudden interest in him and embarrassed because he’s really not the most interesting person to talk to. But he put them both in this situation. He reminds himself that he actually _wants_ to be in it. Plus it’s not like he can escape anywhere on this packed train.

“Teikyo,” Kageyama replies, and then startles when the young stranger lets out a surprised squawk.

“Teikyo?!” he repeats and stares up at him, the grocery bag almost toppling over in his arms. “For real?? I go there, too! What course are you taking? I’m in sports health, second year!”

Kageyama’s heart somersaults clumsily, in pure disbelief of this twist of coincidence. When he turned back time a few minutes ago this outcome was certainly not something he dared imagine; he wasn’t even anywhere near the ballpark of whatever he was hoping for. He can’t be sure, but right now it seems like fate could possibly be a _real_ thing. He’ll gladly become a believer, granted it turns out to be a good one.

“I’m also taking that course,” he eventually says. “Sports health.”

“Seriously?!” The redhead leans closer, looking just about ready to burst with questions and exclamation marks. Then he catches himself and pulls back with a frown. “Wait, if you’re in sports health how come I’ve never seen you in class? You a third year?”

Kageyama’s cheeks bloom bright pink yet again. “First year,” he admits and right away he’s fixed with possibly the widest stare he’s ever seen.

“You’re _younger_ than me?! How old are you? I’m twenty-one.”

“I… I recently turned twenty, so –”

“Wow!” He gapes at him, as if this is the most unbelievable news he’s heard so far in mentioned twenty-one years. “I was so sure you were older! Hey, so that kinda makes me your senpai, huh?”

He smirks, and Kageyama has no idea what he’s supposed to say to that so he keeps his mouth shut and just shrugs half-heartedly.

“In that case,” he adds, carrot leaves swaying in sync with his movements, “just ask if you wanna know anything about the first year classes. I probably can’t be of much help academically, I’m horrible at taking notes and all that so I’m afraid you can’t copy me, but I know what the instructors and professors are like! Let me know if you want tips!”

“Okay… Sure.” Kageyama nods and hopes it doesn’t come off too eager. “Thanks.”

“I’m Hinata Shouyou, by the way!” the redhead says and Kageyama has never before met anyone with a name that seems to perfectly match their very personality. “And you?”

“Uh. Kageyama.”

Hinata tilts his head, curious. “Kageyama… what?”

“…Kageyama Tobio.”

“Cute!” he laughs, loud enough for everyone to hear.

Kageyama’s face turns a shade of beet red in response but if Hinata notices he’s polite enough not to comment on it.

“Oh, this is my stop,” he says instead and reaches for the grocery bag in his arms. “It was nice to meet you – or run into you! See ya around, Kageyama!”

Kageyama is left feeling a little drained in the wake of his company, except in a good, energizing way. He clutches his cheeks; he’s never blushed this much in his entire life. So embarrassing. He rides the line to the next station in a daze before he switches to the correct train, all the while repeating in his head what Hinata had said.

_See ya around, Kageyama._

He can hardly believe he came out of this with not only a proper conversation but also a full name, a fellow student, and even the promise of a next meeting, sort of. That’s way more than he bargained for and he’s not really sure what to do with all this information.

Maybe he’s changed his mind just a little. Maybe he believes in fate and love at first sight after all.

 

**

 

Kageyama thinks most things are connected somehow. He also thinks those connections make slight exceptions for him, because of what he can do.

He doesn’t have a particular name for it, his time-rewinding ability. It doesn’t really matter because Kageyama has never told anyone and he intends to keep it that way, but he mostly thinks of it as a tweak or an adjustment. He makes small alterations in his life whenever he sees fit by rewinding time. All it requires from him is a bit of focus and the ability to count backwards. It’s accurate on the minute, so if he counts backwards from ten he sets himself back ten minutes. After a few years of experimenting he’s found out that counting forwards doesn’t do anything, that he’s only allowed a thirty-minute window, and that there’s no limit to how many times he can rewind and redo within this given window.

That’s all there is to it. It’s nothing remarkable, in Kageyama’s opinion. Impossible? Yes. Weird? Definitely. Super random? For sure. But it isn’t awesome on a grand scale. It’s more like a common magic trick, like pulling cards out of nowhere, rather than a full-blown, take-over-the-world, crazy villain power. So it’s totally like magic, except unimpressive.

Then again, Kageyama can be pretty unimpressive, too. He realizes several hours too late that he never exchanged any contact info with Hinata. They aren’t even in the same year and trying to seek out one person among tens of thousands of students without much to go on is an impossible task. He doesn’t exactly have a big network to help him, either. His friends are, for the most part, people who all have the same thing in common: volleyball. It’s straightforward, easy to keep track of, and more than enough. The rest are acquaintances (also gained through volleyball) or they belong to the periphery of non-volleyball people, like Hinata. And Kageyama doesn’t navigate the periphery very often, which means he possibly staged everything at the station for nothing.

That’s why he’s no less than shocked when he gets out of his last class the following day and finds Hinata waiting for him.

“Kageyama! ” Hinata waves enthusiastically, standing on his tiptoes to make sure he’s visible among the milling students. “Over here!”

Kageyama stares at him for a long moment, dumbstruck, before he cautiously weaves his way through the crowd. He catches himself wondering what he must look like right now. It had been a pretty boring ninety minutes; cell biology isn’t really the most interesting subject. Does he look sleepy? Didn’t he seriously ugly-yawn the moment he walked out of the lecture hall? How’s his hair? He runs his fingers through his fringe as casually as he can, just barely resisting the urge to go back in time so he can mentally prepare for this. He’s already being ridiculous.

“Hello!” Hinata chirps, smiling the same brilliant smile as yesterday.

“Hi…?”

“I asked around for you,” he explains when he sees his confused expression. “A girl I know happens to know one of your friends; Miya… Atsumu, I think? So she texted him and he said you should be in biology class but that you were probably skipping.”

Kageyama frowns. “I don’t skip often,” he murmurs. “Don’t listen to him.”

“Don’t worry,” Hinata laughs. “I figured he was joking. And he was wrong anyway; I mean, I did find you here!”

He spreads his arms wide and gestures at him, adding a small _ta-dah!_ for effect, and he’s just being unfairly adorable. Kageyama sort of wants to attempt a smile, but he’s feeling extremely self-conscious and god knows how many times he’ll have to rewind in order to get it right. Instead he nods and tries to cope with the unwanted blush that has crept onto his face again.

“I’m on my way to pick up a book reservation,” Hinata says and jabs his thumb in the general direction of the library. “You going the same way?”

The library is quite a detour away from the lecture hall and during the time it takes to get there Kageyama has learned that Hinata is also a Sendai-native, exactly like himself, and that his goal is to become a sports therapist after graduation. That’s not very different from Kageyama’s plan, who’s only in this course thanks to a shoulder injury that killed his pro-athlete career.

That’s about as far as their similarities go. Hinata is by definition a summer child. He’s outgoing, easily excitable, loud about his interests, and his family name even has a literal connection to the sun. He lives at the university dorms because he wants what he calls “the full student experience” and seems to have a lot of friends everywhere. He’s very sociable and Kageyama can’t imagine anyone disliking him, not when faced with those big eyes and that blinding smile. Hinata is bright in all senses of the word. Everyone should find it easy to fall in love with him. He’s pretty much the exact opposite of Kageyama.

This time they exchange numbers before they part and Hinata says it again as he leaves – _See ya, Kageyama!_

Kageyama is only given until lunch the next day to doubt those words before a message ticks in on his phone.

  
**Hinata Shouyou**  
Today, 12.14 PM

 _i’m @ the uni cafeteria! if you’re here come say hi!! (_ _ﾉ≧▽≦_ _)_ _ﾉ_

  
The following week they continue to meet up this way, randomly and in the passing, but always long enough to kill ten, fifteen minutes. The message thread on Kageyama’s phone is getting longer and longer and he can’t help but wonder why someone like Hinata would want to befriend someone like _him_ so quickly. Kageyama is not the kind of person who usually goes out of his way to make new friends. He has nothing against it; he just doesn’t seem to connect with most people in a way that’s expected of him. Besides that he’s a tall, standoffish guy. His charm points are practically non-existent.

“But he talks to you and texts you and stuff?” Hoshiumi points out during a study session at the library. “People don’t do that so willingly if they don’t wanna be friends, he’d have to be pretty stupid otherwise. I don’t see the problem here.”

It sounds painfully obvious when he puts it like that but Kageyama still nods as if it’s the most profound thing he’s heard all day and hums in agreement.

“We’re very different, though,” he shrugs. “The things we have in common are pretty general things. Like, we’re both from Sendai and we enjoy sports? I bet it’s the same for thousands of other people.”

“So you made a friend outside of volleyball, it’s not that deep,” Sakusa murmurs from the corner, glancing up from his notes. Kageyama can’t tell if he’s narrowing his eyes into a glare or just yawning behind his face mask. “Congrats, you’re a normal person.”

“By the way, what are you even confiding in _us_ for?” Hoshiumi asks and pretend-shudders. “It’s so creepy when you suddenly care about making friends. This isn’t kindergarten.”

“But you guys forget that Tobio is a loser who overthinks everything,” Atsumu chimes in before Kageyama can protest. He looks up from his laptop, smirking. “He does that when something catches his interest. Like, why else would you text all the time if you weren’t keen on him? Just compare that to how you always leave the rest of us on ‘read’. There’s no way this is only about making friends.”

“Screw you.” Kageyama glowers and chucks a pen in his direction. “We don’t text all the time.”

His phone lights up with another message just as he says it, which immediately earns him loud hoots and teasing cheers from the other guys.

“Shut up!” he barks at them, ears hot. “It’s just my Mom, you assholes.”

His teammates are all good guys and Kageyama usually enjoys their way of harmlessly poking fun at each other, but right now it’s too embarrassing to deal with. He reads the text from his mother and then rewinds six minutes, erasing the entire discussion about Hinata altogether. This time around the study session remains quiet but the blush won’t leave his cheeks.

 

**

 

“My rehabilitation textbook?” Hinata quirks an eyebrow at Kageyama’s request. “What do you need that for? If I remember correctly it’s not even on your reading list.”

Kageyama shrugs. “It’s just for essay reference.”

“Trying to score extra points or something?”

“And if I was? Got a problem with that?”

He glances at him, catching the small twitch of a smile on Hinata’s lips, before turning his face towards the blue sky, enjoying the mild breeze. It’s still quite chilly for spring but there have been plenty of sunny days. They have started taking their readings and assignments outside whenever they can, seeking out the benches and tables placed all over campus.

It’s easy conversations like this that makes Kageyama wonder if his friends were right after all. It’s been little over two months since that day at the station and he tries to remember when and how they became so comfortable around each other. At the same time he can never fully relax. Maybe he’s just feeling guilty about forcing himself into Hinata’s life for completely selfish reasons. It’s the first time Kageyama has used his ability that way. On one hand his common sense tells him to flirt normally, to wait for Hinata to return his feelings, and then to give up on him if he doesn’t. On the other hand his heart convinces him to rewind and redo every so often, even if it’s only to take back a stupid comment, erase an embarrassing stutter, or rephrase a badly worded question. It’s unnecessary but Kageyama figures it can’t hurt. He just wants to leave the very best impression on Hinata, so why not aim for flawless when he has the means to do so? Nobody can blame him for trying.

“I don’t have that book with me, though,” Hinata says, pulling Kageyama out of his conflicting thoughts. “What’re you gonna do about that?”

Hinata looks at him, squinting adorably against the afternoon sun, and Kageyama is totally fine having to deal with these casual friend conversations. When he doesn’t get too caught up in the way Hinata’s hair curls softly at his temples, or the way his sweaters always seem a little too oversized on his frame, or the way his eyes turn a molten golden brown in the pale sunlight, with lashes so light they could just as well be transparent – as long as he doesn’t think too much about all of _that_ he is fine. He can cope, even if it’s just barely.

“You’re close to home,” he points out and nods in direction of the dorms. “Just run and get it.”

“What the heck!” Hinata exclaims indignantly. “What makes you think you can boss me around?”

“Why not? The dorms are literally right over there.”

Hinata pouts, tapping his finger on his chin for a couple of seconds. “Okay – I’ll get it for you but only if you call me ‘senpai’.”

“Not this again…” Kageyama groans, annoyed. “You do realize you’re not a big deal just because you happen to be a year older than me, right?”

Hinata straightens up in his seat, as if his actual full height can somehow compete with Kageyama’s almost 190 centimeters. “I’m one and a _half_ year older than you,” he corrects him, smiling proudly.

“And so what?” Kageyama replies, mildly flustered. “I can’t help that my birthday’s in December!”

“I _know_!” Hinata nearly squeals with delight. “You’re a Christmas baby!” He snorts a laugh and throws his arms out, waving them in wide arches. “Imagine having to wait a _whole_ _year_ to celebrate your birthday!”

“ _Everyone_ waits a whole year to celebrate their birthday, dumbass!”

“Geez, I told you already,” he says, unfazed. “Call me ‘senpai’.”

“Fine – _senpai_ , please let me borrow your rehabilitation textbook,” Kageyama rattles off flatly, to which Hinata just shakes his head and sternly waves a finger at him.

“With feeling, Kageyama! Say it like you mean it!”

Kageyama exhales his heaviest sigh. It’s getting late and the sun is already dropping lower, drawing afternoon shadows from the campus buildings, and he knows he’ll have to admit defeat or this conversation isn’t going to move along at all. So he reaches over the small table, places a hand on his arm, and looks directly into his eyes with what he hopes is his most sincere expression.

“Please,” he says seriously. “I’m begging you, senpai… Won’t you let me borrow your textbook?”

The distant cawing of crows follows his appeal, like a loud question mark, and Kageyama expects Hinata to laugh and fire off another biting response. Instead, a rosy blush gradually turns up on his face. He’s quiet for a few seconds and in the end Kageyama thinks he hears him mutter “that’s not fair” under his breath. After what seems like an eternity he huffs and looks away.

“Alright, fine, I’ll get the stupid book for you,” he says, his voice too soft to match his words. “Just… wait here.”

He gets up and leaves a bewildered Kageyama behind. Did he do something wrong? He doesn’t think so, he literally just said what Hinata told him to say, but the atmosphere suddenly changed out of nowhere and he isn’t sure how to interpret it. Hinata didn’t seem mad or offended, and he looked really cute blushing like that, but Kageyama also can’t help but worry, without knowing exactly why.

He doesn’t have to sit through these worries, though. He _can_ do something about them. He supposes he can always borrow the textbook at the library instead.

Kageyama goes twenty minutes back in time, reducing their earlier conversation to a private memory Hinata won’t even know happened. They end up gathering their things before parting ways outside the dorms, and Kageyama walks home feeling both relieved and uneasy. That was a strange, loaded moment. Maybe he should’ve just let the whole thing run its course, see where it would actually take them, but then again he’d much rather be safe and confused than sorry and heartbroken.

He sighs. Atsumu was right; he really does overthink everything.

 

**

 

Thirty minutes isn’t a long time in modern society measurements, but Kageyama doesn’t need any more than that. A lot can be achieved within that thirty-minute bracket.

During his second year in high school he witnessed a collision between a bicycle and a car. He was walking home from late practice and was the only one at that back-alley intersection when it happened. It all went down so fast he could only watch as the person on the bike took a tumble, flying in a wide arch over the hood of the car before landing with a sickening thud on the other side. Kageyama’s entire body immediately went heavy and cold, his legs glued in place while he tried to recall all the health classes he’d never paid attention to. He always thought he’d be levelheaded enough to know what to do should the situation arise, and it was a shock to realize he wasn’t at all.

Then he remembered he could literally just turn back time. In a rush of blind panic he closed his eyes, counted all of them back into the past, and somehow managed to warn the bike of the quickly approaching car. He watched both vehicles make it smoothly through the intersection without any incidents and felt a bizarre mix of déjà vu and pride. He just did _that_. He had single-handedly prevented someone from getting seriously injured, maybe even from dying.

That feeling persisted for a while; it followed him home, pursued him in his dreams, lingered in the back of his mind for days while he toyed with the idea of becoming a superhero of sorts, one that could save people just by bending time a few minutes.

But as intensely as it had felt it also quickly faded. Looking out for other people turned out to be a lot more complicated and taxing than Kageyama thought. He became anxious and hyperaware of his surroundings. He was always looking for potential dangers and accidents. He adopted a constant state of alert for no reason at all – his pulse raced, his hands trembled, his shirt clung to his back in cold sweat. In the end it started interfering with volleyball, which was when he decided it wasn’t worth it. The thought of taking charge over other people’s lives so directly felt wrong, no matter how good his intentions. He never was a particularly heroic type anyway.

Since then he has spent that flexible pocket of thirty minutes on things only concerning himself. Most of the time he makes minor adjustments, such as starting over on a quiz, making sure he doesn’t miss his train, or simply giving himself five more minutes in the morning, just because he can. If his tea goes cold he can go back. If he trips and falls he can go back. They’re such small, insignificant things and he can always go back.

But now, as he finds himself under Hinata’s searching gaze, a familiar feeling is slowly creeping back into his body, settling in his gut – the feeling that he’s doing something wrong.

Kageyama doesn’t know what he’s supposed to tell him, but he’s definitely not about to admit that he was here five minutes earlier, right outside the lecture hall, watching Hinata talking to another student. The reason why he pulled this move is unclear even to him – maybe it was the fact that he failed to catch Hinata’s attention, or the fact that someone else was responsible for the happy look on his face, or the fact that they looked so close, or the fact that he couldn’t ignore the prickly sensation in the pit of his stomach. Maybe it was a combination of all of that. But _something_ had come over him and his insides had bristled, his chest constricting with both panic and irritation.

The next thing he knew he made a quick adjustment and sprinted towards the lecture hall again, one single thought in his head: get to Hinata before this other guy and nip their entire conversation in the bud.

The result is that he’s now standing here, out of breath and slightly disheveled, in front of a confused Hinata – and he didn’t plan any further than that.

“Kageyama…?”

“You…” he begins, frantically searching his brain. “Um, you wanna have a coffee or something with me?” he blurts out, grabbing onto the first thing that occurs to him.

“What –?”

“You have a free period around this time, right?”

“Y-yeah, but –” Hinata narrows his eyes at him, suspicious. “Don’t _you_ have class, though?”

“It was cancelled last minute,” Kageyama lies. “So how about it? Coffee? Now? On me?”

“Well…” Hinata considers his distraught expression, looking doubtful. Then he shrugs and smiles at him. “Sure, why not? That sounds nice!”

Guilt doesn’t hit Kageyama until he’s standing in line at the closest coffee shop. When it does it hits hard and he feels rotten all the way to the core. If he were in denial he would have blamed it on the stressful start of a new semester and how he hasn’t settled in yet, but his denial doesn’t run that deep. He’s aware of what he just did.

He literally prevented Hinata from talking to someone. He acted on a moment’s stupid jealousy and went right in there, shamelessly and deliberately, and altered something that didn’t have anything to do with him in the first place. It may not have been anything important or significant, but that was a conversation that didn’t concern him at all. He stopped it from even happening and he had no right to do that.

Because his adjustments were always so trivial and small, Kageyama has never given much consideration to how widely his ability can actually reach. Now that he does it’s a frightening thought. Maybe it’s a lot more powerful than he gives it credit for and he should probably quit doing it altogether.

“What’s wrong?” Hinata asks when Kageyama comes back with their coffees.

Kageyama squirms a little as he sits down at the table, caught under Hinata’s observant gaze.

“It’s nothing,” he says, choosing another lie. “Just… shoulder pain.”

“Your volleyball injury?”

“Yeah, I forgot to take a painkiller this morning. But it’s fine.”

“You idiot,” Hinata scolds him gently. “Of course you have to remember to take your meds!” He hesitates, twirling his cup between his hands. “You know, if it’s really bad maybe you should consider seeing a different physiotherapist? If you ask one of our instructors I’m sure they can recommend somebody.”

“I bet.”

“Seriously,” he continues insistently, “they all have big networks. They know all sorts of people in the medical field, I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them could get you in contact with some really distinguished expert or something. I could ask around for you, if you want, I’d hate to see you in pain or anything –”

Kageyama zones out a little, regretting he didn’t come up with a more general excuse. Hinata means well, he always does, but he feels bad enough already; he’s not in the mood for talking about volleyball and an injury he knows he can’t do much about.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles.

Before Hinata can respond he closes his eyes and sets them back three minutes, all the while feeling awful.

He brings them their coffees again but this time his expression must’ve changed because Hinata doesn’t ask what’s wrong. Instead he beams at him, all pale freckles and crescent eyes, and Kageyama knows he’s too weak to stop rewinding. It’s become a safety net he can’t let go of, a habit that’s hard to break. Sometimes he’s even rewarded with tiny moments like this, where he falls in love with Hinata a little bit more. Somewhere in the back of his mind he’s managed to convince himself it’s all worth it in the end.

 

**

 

“I hope you don’t mind me saying so but you’ve seemed stressed lately.”

Kageyama looks up from his curry, his spoon still poised ready in the air, his mouth half open. He lets his arm drop slowly and blinks at Hinata.

“I have?”

Hinata nods, his expression open, waiting. “Did something happen?”

Kageyama fidgets in his seat and glances around the university cafeteria. It’s more packed than usual today but they’ve managed to capture a table next to one of the large windows, putting them directly in a sunny spot. They’ve been talking loosely about nothing in particular, only adding to the clamor of voices surrounding them. Kageyama didn’t even think anything was off about his behavior but apparently he was wrong. He keeps forgetting how perceptive Hinata can be.

He straightens up, trying to mentally prepare himself for where this conversation is headed. “No, I just… I’ve got a lot on my mind, that’s all,” he shrugs and quickly shoves another spoonful of curry into his mouth.

“You don’t have exams yet, right? You’ve got plenty of time to relax, still!” Hinata rests his chin in his hand and thinks about it for a second, pushing a leftover piece of carrot around on his empty plate, before he suddenly lights up. “Hey, I know! We should play some volleyball together!”

Kageyama is one chew away from inhaling his food down the wrong pipe. He swallows audibly and coughs into his hand.

“Volleyball…?” he repeats doubtfully once he’s caught his breath.

“Yeah, volleyball!” Hinata laughs at his panicked expression, mistaking it for surprise. “You know, the sport where you hit a ball back and forth across a net?” he adds jokingly. “I mean, you play it semi-regularly and I used to play in high school… We should totally get together one weekend. Maybe we can gather enough people to form two teams, I bet that’s possible. It’ll be like an actual game!”

Kageyama bites his lip and looks down at his plate, wavering. Ever since he learned about Hinata’s brief volleyball career he’s been expecting this question to eventually come up – and he’s also feared it. Thing is, he wants to hang out with Hinata as much as possible. He wants them to become closer. Playing volleyball together sounds really nice. But wanting to play on a level that makes Hinata feel good about it is one thing. Holding himself back in fear of possibly losing his temper is something completely different. It’s been forever since Kageyama was fourteen, he has mellowed out considerably since then, but he’s always going to be an athlete at heart and in mind. Adjusting to a new player, and a novice at that, is something he hasn’t had to deal with in a long time.

 _There’s no problem here_ , a small voice inside his head says. _Just turn back time if you mess up._

Kageyama quickly shuts that voice out. He’s never used time traveling on volleyball, not even once. It’s a principle that has become very important to him through the years, and he wants it to stay that way. Inviting Hinata into the game, even just a fun, friendly game, means he might have to break that promise – and he just can’t.

“You’re a setter, correct?” Hinata continues with the same unshakeable enthusiasm. “I love to spike so that’s already a perfect match right there, and also –” He interrupts himself when he’s getting no response. “Kageyama? Are you listening?”

“Um, yeah.” He pokes at the rest of his food with his spoon, his appetite completely gone. “Yeah, I’m listening. Sorry.”

“So you’re good to go, then?”

“What?”

Hinata sighs, exasperated. “You wanna play volleyball with me?”

Kageyama is sure there’s a decent explanation lingering in his chest somewhere, a small on-the-spot lie, but then he suddenly sees Hinata’s face and shoulders droop in disappointment. He realizes he’s once again acted way ahead of himself and that he’s already answered him with an abrupt “no”.

“Okay…?” Hinata tilts his head, eyebrows creased, lips shaped around a slight pout. “Why not?”

He looks genuinely sad and Kageyama’s conscience suffers a heavy blow. He shakes his head, determined to be firm about this. This is the one thing he really wants them to leave completely alone and Hinata is just going to have to understand and accept that.

“I can’t, that’s all.”

“But _why_? It’s not because of school, is it? Are you already behind? Or – is it your shoulder? It’s just a fun game, you know, you don’t have to go all out. And I mean, nothing’s settled or anything, we don’t have to decide on a date right now. If you’d like to think about it then –”

Kageyama blanks out for a second, maybe two. During that tiny fraction of time he’s drained of all patience, left with only a tight twist of hot temper that he can’t hold back. When he snaps into the moment again he drops the spoon with a clatter and looks up, glaring.

“Damnit, I already said I _can’t_! Just leave it, Hinata!”

His outburst is much louder than intended. He isn’t even aware until he realizes everyone at the table next to them have fallen quiet. They’re sneaking suspicious glances in their direction, whispering in hushed voices among themselves, but their reaction is nothing compared to Hinata’s face. He’s just staring back at him, eyes shiny and shoulders tense, his expression torn between disbelief, surprise, and hurt. Kageyama could have punched himself. He’s such an idiot.

The situation is what it is and leaves nothing up for discussion. Kageyama chokes back a sigh and presses his palms against his eyelids, hard enough for bursts of light to appear, and then he counts backwards again, going all the way back to twenty. It brings them right outside the cafeteria, where they’re just about to head inside for lunch. Kageyama pretends to check his phone, throws together some half-assed excuse for canceling their lunch date, and then heads straight home, ditching the rest of his classes for the day.

He’s so pathetic like this, allowing himself and his behavior to be dictated by someone else, and that someone else doesn’t even know they’re doing it. It’s like he’s stuck in a loop he can’t break out of and with each tweak of his timeline, with every rewind of the clock, he feels worse. It’s unfair to the both of them.

He wishes he could’ve met Hinata differently, maybe been in the same year as him, maybe even been his friend since high school. They could’ve played volleyball together all the time and he could’ve fallen in love with him gradually – not headfirst like this.

But Kageyama’s magic tricks are useless for these kinds of wishes.

 

**

 

 **Hinata Shouyou  
**Friday, 10.45 PM

 _hey kageyama what’s up!?? haven’t seen you lately so… wanna check out a movie tomorrow?? senpai’s treat!!!! let me know ok??? (_ _｡_ _•̀ᴗ-)b_ _☆_

**

 

Winter’s stubborn ghost seems to have let go of spring at last. The temperature is slowly rising all over the country, bringing with it warmer winds and clearer skies. The cherry blossoms have also finally opened up and the city is thriving under a blanket of pale pink and soft lavender.

Kageyama tried putting some distance between them after his awkward departure from lunch, but it’s in Hinata’s nature to reach out to people and if he thought his behavior was strange he doesn’t mention it. Either way, Kageyama is happy he ended up accepting his invitation. He went more or less blind into the movie he’d picked, and even though he told Hinata afterwards his taste sucked he’d been pleasantly surprised by it. He’s just grateful and relieved they’re hanging out again as if nothing happened. It looks like things have returned to normal and it has helped him relax and have fun tonight.

In hindsight, maybe that’s what made him act too confidently.

Hinata recounts the movie’s most action-filled plot points while they’re walking home, reliving them with wide gestures and animated expressions, going all in with appropriate sound effects. He leaves very little room in the discussion for anybody else but Kageyama doesn’t mind one bit. He doesn’t care if Hinata is loud or over-enthusiastic. He’d never tweak his timeline to erase anything about this moment.

“This was great, don’t you agree?” Hinata finally says and beams up at him. “Thanks for coming with me!”

His bright hair soaks up the setting sun, creating a halo for itself against the backdrop of cherry blossoms, and Kageyama can’t help but stare at him. He’s reminded of how he felt when he first saw Hinata at the station, how there was a perfect moment of spring in the dead of winter. It almost seems like that moment was a vision, that what’s happening here right now was meant to happen all along. He wonders if that was really just his way of traveling into the future.

He vaguely registers Hinata saying his name but he blanks out instead of responding to it. With his hands still tucked inside his pockets, Kageyama bends down without another word and kisses him.

It’s not really much of a kiss. Their lips are just brushing but the brief contact between them creates a full stop and suddenly they’re moving in slow motion. One second feels like five, the sounds of the city are muffled and faraway, the evening breeze running past them is nothing but a gentle caress, and Hinata’s breath is warm against his upper lip, just one long exhale frozen in time.

It’s when Kageyama pulls back that he realizes what he’s actually done, and even before the world speeds back up to normal he knows all too well that he just pulled the wrong move.

“K-Kageyama…?” Hinata’s voice is so soft it’s barely above a whisper, his eyes blown wide open in shock.

Just hearing his name come out in such a weak stutter amplifies Kageyama’s regret. He isn’t even sure what he was thinking, if he was thinking at all. He just got so caught up in the moment, in that beautiful feeling, but it’s already pretty obvious he overstepped his boundaries.

So he doesn’t bother with a reply or an explanation – like always he turns to the safety of bad habits and presses his eyes shut, immediately counting backwards. He should be fine going back five minutes. It’ll be like it never happened.

“Kageyama –? What’s the matter…?”

Hinata’s voice interrupts him the exact moment he reaches ‘zero’. His brain stops in its tracks, unable to make sense of those words. He slowly opens his eyes and finds Hinata staring back at him. His eyebrows are pulled into a worried frown, his lips a thin line of doubt – and it dawns on Kageyama that they haven’t moved at all. They’re still standing there, under the canopy of cherry blossoms, and they’ve just kissed. He counted backwards like always but nothing has changed. His timeline – _their_ timeline – has stayed the exact same.

His gut twists with anxiety and he shakes his head, trying to catch his bearings. He must’ve messed up somewhere, somehow ( _messed up counting backwards from_ five _? what the hell_ ). Again, he blocks a confused Hinata out of his view and very carefully repeats the sequence. Once again he hits zero and opens his eyes – only to find that nothing has changed this time around either.

“Seriously,” Hinata says, and now there’s a sharp, nervous edge in his voice. “What are you doing?”

All words are caught in Kageyama’s throat, where they remain jumbled and meaningless. This isn’t something he can explain in a heartbeat. He doesn’t even know what’s going on. It’s obvious that rewinding has failed him but he can’t for the life of him think of a reason for it. This is the first time in as long as he can remember where he isn’t free to tweak time at his will.

The first thing that truly grabs hold of him is confusion. The second thing that follows is panic. The third is Hinata’s hand, which comes to a careful rest on his arm. Kageyama stares back at his troubled, almost pleading expression, facing his consequences for the first time ever, and everything in him is refusing to deal with it.

“I –” he begins stupidly, his lips numb. He takes a step back and Hinata’s hand slips away from his arm.

“Kageyama –”

“I’m sorry – I’m really, really sorry.”

That’s all he manages to stutter before he does something he never thought he’d ever have to do – he runs away. It’s an absolutely brainless act, one that’s going to be hard to justify and even harder to recover from, but he can’t find it in himself to stop and turn back. Instead he breaks into a full run when he hears Hinata calling after him, not once looking back over his shoulder.

When he gets home he immediately turns his phone off. Then he goes straight to bed and proceeds to spend a few sleepless hours trying and constantly failing to rewind time. Maybe he was only given a certain quota of adjustments. Maybe all his mindless tweaks created an excess of time, time that had nowhere to go, and in the end all the accumulated leftovers reached a bursting point. Maybe he has outgrown it. Maybe he has shown himself unworthy.

Kageyama hasn’t got the faintest idea. He doesn’t even know how he got this time travel ability in the first place, why it had to be exactly _him,_ or how it really works on a larger scale. He never asked for it and he never would’ve known he could do it hadn’t he discovered it by chance in elementary school. It’s just always been a part of him and now it’s gone and he doesn’t know what to do.

It seems he’s stuck following the same stream of time as everybody else now. That means kissing Hinata still remains a fact. The fact that he ran away like some idiot also remains. Everything he’s done since that moment in the park remains, it is actual history, and this time there’s nothing he can do to change or erase that.

 

**

 

Kageyama wakes up from restless sleep around noon the next day. He blinks groggily up at the ceiling and frowns. He thought he heard knocking but he isn’t sure whether it was for real or if he just imagined or dreamed it. He lies still, straining his ears, and then the knocking occurs again. This time there’s no mistaking it. He freezes up but doesn’t move, only tries to convince himself he didn’t hear anything. Another knock follows, a little more insistent, and Kageyama pretends a bit more intensely that whoever it is will go away in the end. It’s quiet for a few hesitant seconds before a voice drifts through the door.

“Hello? Kageyama?”

Something within him surges and then disconnects, as if his chest is about to cave in on him.

It’s Hinata.

He glances at his turned off phone, which has been lying on the TV stand since yesterday, face down for good measure. He doesn’t even want to think about how many unread messages he must’ve received by now for Hinata to come visit him like this.

“Kageyama?” his muffled voice says again. “Look, I know you’re home. Can I please come in?” There’s another halting pause. “I grew up with a little sister so I’m pretty patient. I can do this all day, just so you know.”

Kageyama sighs. He can keep quiet for as long as he wants but he knows when he’s been defeated. He gets up, pulls on some clothes, runs his hands through his hair, and then drags himself to the door, almost hung over with anxiety. He reluctantly opens up to a Hinata that just stares at him for a split-second before breaking into a wide grin.

“There you are! And hey, you don’t look as crappy as I expected!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he mutters as Hinata slips past him.

“Nothing, I just figured you’d had a sleepless night crying into your pillow and all that. Never mind.” He shrugs, offering an apologetic smile when he realizes his joke is lost on Kageyama. “I asked your friend Miya-san for your address. Hope that’s okay?”

“Well, you’re here now, so…” Kageyama gestures into the air. “You, uh, you want something to drink or…?”

“Nah, I’m good! But thanks! I just wanted to check on you, really, I wasn’t –”

“I–I’m so sorry about yesterday,” Kageyama blurts out, cutting him off. “I don’t know what came over me, I just – I messed up.”

“Hey – don’t.” Hinata shakes his head. “It already happened. Don’t worry about it.”

“How can I not, though?” Kageyama rubs the back of his neck and looks away, face hot. “How can I not worry about it? It’s not something you do out of the blue. It was just… just really awkward, wasn’t it? And I was afraid it would ruin… you know.”

“Ruin what?”

“Well… _This_.” He motions between them with his hand, embarrassed. “I mean, we’re friends, right?”

Hinata stares at him for a long moment, and a glimpse of something worn out, even annoyed, dances across his features. Then it vanishes and he smiles instead, although there’s something strangely sad about it.

“Listen…” He pauses, chewing on his bottom lip. “There’s something I’ve wanted to talk to you about.”

The floor tilts in a second’s seasickness and Kageyama’s heart lurches. The tone in his voice sounds harmless enough but he doesn’t particularly like the look on his face. It’s hesitant, elusive in a way, and that’s rare for Hinata whose expressions are always so straightforward.

“Right…” he says warily, feeling the pressure of whatever is lying in wait behind his unspoken words. “What’s up?”

“Well…” Hinata’s glance darts around the room before settling on Kageyama’s face. He nervously shifts his weight from one leg to the other. “I don’t wanna offend you or anything, and I don’t think it’s intentional on your side, but… there’s something about you I just don’t understand.”

After a syrupy moment of nothing, something clicks inside Kageyama’s head, one gear finding another, turning over. He isn’t sure if it’s the start of some bigger epiphany or if he’s simply trying to decipher what Hinata means. Either way it doesn’t feel good.

“Um… Okay?”

“I’m… not sure what it is, though? Sometimes I just feel like you’re holding back for some reason? It’s like – how do I put this…” Hinata stops for a moment, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “It’s like you often change your mind last minute, or you space out completely, or you’re thinking very hard about something else. But at the same time you always pay attention. I kinda feel like you’re one step ahead somehow…? I can’t explain it, really, it’s like trying to grasp water.” He shrugs helplessly. “There’s nothing _wrong_. It’s just a feeling I have.”

Silence falls between them, a space filled with expectation and confusion, and Kageyama has no idea what he’s supposed to tell him. Obviously his adjustment of time hasn’t gone by as smoothly as he thought. He has done his best to patch their timelines together, and he was convinced it passed unnoticed, but somewhere in between these frayed edges Hinata has somehow noticed that something’s off. He doesn’t understand what it is because how could he? So naturally he thinks it has something to do with Kageyama’s personality. This is not what he wanted at all. He just wanted to leave a good impression, for Hinata to like him back. He doesn’t know how to explain all of that without sounding like a complete nutcase.

“I… I’m so sorry,” he mutters lamely. “I don’t really know what to say.”

“It’s okay, I’m just rambling,” Hinata replies and his smile is almost wide enough to hide his disappointment. “Maybe you need some time to think?” he suggests. “I know I do, so maybe that’s something you would want, too? I didn’t mean to ambush you like this.”

He’s always so considerate in the smallest, warmest of ways and Kageyama’s heart aches tremendously. He nods stiffly, although he’s not sure if he’s agreeing or just resigning himself to the hopelessness of the situation.

“…I should probably head home,” Hinata offers. “I guess I’ll see you next week?”

“Yeah… Sure. I’ll see you.”

They stand there in silence for a few seconds longer before Hinata eventually waves goodbye and leaves. Kageyama bumps his head against the closed door and sighs. He’s used to personal criticism after many years of playing volleyball. This wasn’t anything like that but he still has that same heavy, nauseating feeling in his gut that only a thorough scolding can give. It’s like he went through a breakup and he’s just now starting to realize it.

 

**

 

The promise of ‘next week’ remains unfulfilled until weekend rolls around again. They haven’t met up at all but it’s not surprising it turned out this way. On the contrary Kageyama kind of expected it to be an empty promise. Besides, he hasn’t exactly gone out of his way to contact Hinata. Something keeps letting go and taking hold inside of him, a feeling of simultaneous relief and anxiety, a constant catch and release of conflicting emotions. He’s not dealing well with it and so he tries his best to ignore it all together.

His cursed ability also seems to have left him for good. Kageyama takes a moment to stop and count backwards whenever he can, just to check, but it doesn’t have any effect. The alarm clock goes off, the train speeds forward, class drones on in the same tempo, and the pop quizzes are a one-try thing. Not that it really matters anymore.

He’s kind of been avoiding his other friends as well, making up excuses for not studying or hanging out with them, often mentioning his shoulder as reason for not showing up to practice. It’s all very suspicious behavior and he knows it.

So does Miya Atsumu, and if there’s someone who won’t stand for that kind of nonsense it’s definitely him.

Kageyama is trying to catch a well-deserved nap after a particularly tiresome seminar when Atsumu barges unannounced into his apartment.

“Tobio? Tobio, you home?”

Kageyama doesn’t bother with a reply. He just listens to him noisily kick his shoes off and then stomp the three or four steps it takes to get through the cramped entryway. In a matter of seconds he shows up in the middle of his living room, all dressed and ready for practice, by the looks of it. Without any further greetings he throws a volleyball straight at him. Kageyama barely manages to catch it before it hits him in the face.

“Hey,” he says flippantly, slightly out of breath. “I came in.”

“Yeah,” Kageyama replies dryly. “I can see that.”

“Come with me.”

Kageyama shoots him a glare. “Why?”

“To play volleyball, duh. We’re meeting up for a three-on-three.”

“Good for you, then,” he mutters with a shrug. “Have fun.”

“Aw, don’t be like that.” Atsumu crosses his arms, borderline offended, before he walks over to his futon and flops down next to him. “I came _all_ the way here to get you,” he complains. “Don’t tell me it was wasted.”

“You literally live only half a block from here.”

A quiet moment passes between them before Atsumu speaks again. “This is about Hinata, right? You really got a thing for him?”

Kageyama hesitates, twirling the volleyball in his hands a couple of times, wondering if he should deny everything. But Atsumu has already guessed what the problem is and he knows he’s right, annoying as that is. In the end Kageyama just shrugs a sullen confirmation.

“So what did you do?”

“Why does this necessarily have to be _my_ fault…?”

Atsumu offers him an easy smile. “I don’t know Hinata very well but I know what he’s like. And he’s not the type to go around making people look the way you do now. So logically, the one who messed up here must’ve been you.”

Kageyama tosses the ball up, watching it go high enough to cast a split-second’s blurry shadow on the ceiling before it falls back into his waiting hands. He then sighs and leans the ball against his forehead, closing his eyes.

“I… I kinda kissed him.”

“Kinda?”

“Yeah, kinda. And it didn’t turn out the way I expected so… I ran away.”

“You ran away?” Atsumu repeats in disbelief. “Like, _literally_? You just took off? Wow, how stupid are you?”

“Shut up,” Kageyama murmurs, frowning through the embarrassed blush creeping onto his face. “I panicked, okay?”

He explains the situation (minus the time travel element) and everything Hinata had told him afterwards, trying to ignore how much his stomach twists and churns at having to relive it.

“He was really nice about the whole thing, too,” he finishes glumly. “Which only makes it worse.”

He half expects a mocking laugh but instead Atsumu frowns, humming thoughtfully.

“It kinda makes sense, though,” he says after a moment. “I mean, you _are_ a bit weird like that. It’s hard to explain but I get it when he says you’re one step ahead. I’ve also noticed that. Sometimes I even get the feeling you can see the future or whatever. I’m sure you _can’t_ , because you’re an idiot, but it’s totally creepy.”

Kageyama stops spinning the ball and stares up at the unlit roof. It’s not shocking or anything, not at this point, but if Atsumu and Hinata have noticed then he supposes all of his friends and family have, too. He wonders if everyone he’s ever met or talked to have noticed that something’s off about him. Maybe this is what his parents were referring to when they said he used to be a quiet kid, or maybe this has been the reason why everyone seems to think he’s cold and unapproachable. It probably runs deep in his personality already but maybe his constant rewinding has been a contributing part.

“I bet you’re overthinking, as always,” Atsumu interrupts him and gets up. “Come and play a set or two with us, okay? Get this off your mind for a bit. It’ll be even easier for me to beat you now, too, since you’re not only a crippled volleyball player but also a heartbroken one,” he adds jokingly and smirks.

“Yeah, right,” Kageyama replies and tosses the volleyball at him. “In your dreams.”

He may not be able to play professionally anymore but his tosses are as accurate as ever and his game sense never left him. For obvious reasons he’s not a regular on the university team, he’s a reserve at best, and it’s not really necessary for the coach to allow him to join practice. Yet he’s kind enough to let him and Kageyama is more than grateful. He’s still a pretty good setter, even though he never got the career he wanted, and sometimes he can offer the others some valuable advice and tips. It doesn’t change anything and there’s no doubt it’s bittersweet, but he’s happy to know that one of the most important things in his life has remained a solid anchor, completely free from all the time traveling nonsense.

His team ends up beating Atsumu’s in two consecutive sets. By the time they’re ready to pack up and go home the skyline has turned dark with heavy rainclouds. When they leave the gym it has already begun to rain and they all stop by a convenience store near campus for drinks and snacks and shelter.

Kageyama is on his way out the door when he bumps shoulders with someone. Instinctively, he reaches out to keep the person from losing their balance and then does a double take when he registers a bright flash of orange.

“H-Hinata…?”

“Oh!” Hinata looks up at him, eyes full of surprise. “Kageyama!”

“Uh… What are you doing here…?”

“Well, I was on my way home but then it started to rain.” He grins sheepishly and runs his hand through his hair, which has already gotten wet. “I totally forgot to bring an umbrella.”

Behind them, Hoshiumi groans. “Damnit, we also forgot umbrellas.”

Hinata peers around Kageyama’s shoulder and waves at the rest of the group. “Hey, guys! You all headed back from practice?”

There’s a mix of hums and nods that quickly fade into silence. They huddle together under the narrow awning of the store, just watching the increasing rain, awkwardly quiet for a group that large. Kageyama can feel the collective gaze of the other guys boring into his back and has to admit he’s trapped, in every sense of the word.

“We’re gonna go on ahead, Tobio,” Atsumu eventually says and starts shoving their loudly protesting friends out into the rain. He pulls his jacket halfway over his head before shooting him a poignant look that clearly says _Sort it out, idiot._

With that, Kageyama is left alone with Hinata. The hard rain is the only thing that interrupts the silence between them. He prays for someone to enter or exit the store, just for the sake of relief, but people seem to be doing the same thing they are; seeking shelter somewhere and waiting it out. It doesn’t help that this is usually a quiet street, either. As always, he leaves it up to Hinata to break the ice.

“So… about the last time we spoke… Did you get to do any thinking?”

“Some, I guess…?” Kageyama replies unsurely before lamely adding, “What about you?”

“Yeah… Same.”

They find themselves stuck in another uncomfortable silence and Kageyama desperately wishes he still had some means of buying himself time. He’s really had it convenient all these years. Now that his crutch is gone he has to place his faith in coincidences, but it seems the odds aren’t in his favor right now. He’s stuck with an awkward situation and several possible outcomes, most of them unfortunate. They’re not getting anywhere like this and Kageyama can’t do anything but move forward and deal with it, but that doesn’t mean he’s confident.

“Hinata,” he starts, knowing all too well how this is going to sound. “I – maybe I have an explanation as to why you feel the way you do… about me, I mean.”

Hinata looks up at him with interest, eyebrows arched. “Oh?”

“Yeah, I’m –” Kageyama hesitates, fidgeting. “This is probably gonna sound crazy –”

“I’m sure it won’t,” Hinata interrupts him. He smiles encouragingly, almost bright enough to cancel out the rain. “I’m pretty open-minded, you know. Give it a try!”

Kageyama swallows back a sigh, worrying his sweaty palms deep into his pockets, closing his hands into fists. Somehow those supportive words and that lovely smile make everything seem a little bit worse, a little bit harder, as if a rift has appeared between them. But he’s already said this much. He can’t go back now.

“Well – I had this… this _thing_ that I used to be able to do. It was something I used to get to know you better.”

Hinata blinks. “A thing?” he repeats, confused. “What kind of thing?”

Kageyama’s face goes red-hot with dread and embarrassment. He shuts his eyes for a moment and squares his shoulders, making an honest attempt at gathering his courage.

“I… okay. I can go back in time. Or… I _could_ go back in time. It doesn’t work anymore, for whatever reasons, but… I’ve used it a few times around you. I even – I even used it to stage our meeting, you know, at the train station. So that’s… probably why it seemed like I was spacing out so often… because I was always trying to… well – go back.”

He trails off pathetically, his clumsy words unbelievable and misplaced in the deafening silence that follows. It’s the most ridiculous thing he’s ever had to confess to someone and the worst part is that it’s true.

After a few long seconds he finally dares a sideways glance at Hinata and is met with a stare he didn’t expect. It’s unreadable at first, just a pair of brown eyes trained blankly on him. It’s odd and unsettling – until he suddenly notices the tears welling up in them.

“I didn’t think you’d be this cruel,” Hinata says quietly.

Kageyama’s heart leaps and immediately drops, leaving him numb and cold all over.

“What –?”

Hinata blinks slowly and then shudders with surprise, as if just realizing he’s almost about to cry. He furiously wipes at his eyes with the back of his hand.

“That’s not a very funny joke, Kageyama.”

“What –? No –” Kageyama shakes his head fervently. “I’m not – I wasn’t –”

“Maybe we shouldn’t do this.” Hinata ignores his rambling and breaks eye contact, hair falling into his face. “I… don’t think I wanna talk to you right now.”

Without sparing him another word he heads out into the rain, no hesitation, and falls into a brisk tempo down the street. The rain is coming down in droves, heavy sheets nearly wiping out Hinata’s vanishing silhouette, and a jolt rushes through Kageyama’s body. If he lets him leave now, like this, it’s going to be hard to make up for anything. Whatever the final outcome is, he can’t let him leave on a misunderstanding, thinking he’s a liar who can’t take anything seriously – because he does. Kageyama takes this _so_ seriously, just as much as he once did volleyball, and it’s obvious how that went just because he was being careless. Determinately, he shoulders his bag, ducks his head against the rain, and sprints after him.

“Hinata! Wait –”

The wet pavement echoes with his steps, cold water splashing over his shoes and seeping into his socks, but he doesn’t care. He quickly catches up to Hinata and falls into step next to him.

“Hinata –”

“I said I don’t wanna talk.”

He grabs him by the arm, making him stop. “Just – please,” he implores. “Please, wait.”

Hinata shrugs out of his grip and glares reluctantly at him, his wet hair plastered to his forehead and temples.

“Look – I’m sorry,” Kageyama says. “I’m really sorry. That’s what I should have said instead. I’m sorry this is how everything turned out. It’s not what I was aiming for at all.”

Hinata hesitates before he deflates slightly, his shoulders sagging. “That’s not what I expected when I said we should think about it. I didn’t expect you’d try and brush it all off with a joke. That’s what it sounded like to me, anyway.”

“I know, and I get it. But I swear I wasn’t trying to crack a stupid joke, I just – I thought you deserved to know the truth. You don’t have to believe me or anything. I’m aware of how insane it sounds so if you can, please forget I said it. Sometimes I don’t believe me, either.”

Kageyama sighs, shrugging against the water trailing down between his shoulder blades.

“I really like you,” he continues. “That’s all you need to know. I wanted to make sure I made a good impression on you, and I thought I could do that by going back in time and correcting all of my mistakes. But… it doesn’t matter how many times I’d go back for a second try. There was no guarantee you’d actually like me back.”

They stand there facing each other, the rain pelting down. Kageyama is already drenched to the bone but he couldn’t care less. All he wants is some kind of response.

“Not that I believe you’re a time traveler or whatever…” Hinata squints, searching for words. “But you were really just trying to make a good impression…?”

“Yes.”

“And… you’re saying you staged that day at the station, when we met? Like – what? – you ran into me on purpose or –?”

“…Yeah, I did,” Kageyama admits, shoulders slumped in shame. “I’m not proud of it but… when I saw you I couldn’t really think of anything else. I just knew I had to talk to you. I get that it’s weird and creepy and that I’ve probably lost face with you and everything, but it seemed worth it at the time.”

“And now? Do you still think it was worth it?”

“That depends, doesn’t it?” He offers a limp shrug, leaving the ball in Hinata’s court. “You tell me.”

Hinata considers his words for another long moment. A couple of shapes with umbrellas hurry past them, a faint shadow stops at the nearest vending machine before running for cover, a silhouette in a rain poncho speeds past on a scooter. Kageyama barely registers them. They could be ghosts, for all he cares. It’s like they’re not even a part of their world, their private bubble.

“You didn’t lose face with me,” Hinata mumbles in the end. “And you already made a great impression on me from the very beginning. I like you just the way you are. I never would’ve expected you to be perfect or anything.”

Maybe it’s the rain, or maybe it’s his pulse echoing loudly in his ears, or maybe he simply blacked out for a second – but Kageyama isn’t sure he properly caught what he just said. He tilts his head, frowning.

“What?”

“What…?” Hinata parrots back in confusion, mirroring his tilted head.

“You like me?”

Hinata stares, looking more than just a little dumbfounded, his mouth hanging open. “Are you stupid?!” he then exclaims, making Kageyama draw back in surprise. “Ever since we met I’ve been trying to hang out with you as much as possible! Because I’ve been interested in you this whole time! You’re telling me you never realized?”

He groans, trembling droplets of water falling from his fringe. He stomps his foot in frustration, creating a splash in a small puddle.

“I mean, you’re really sweet and funny and… you’re not exactly bad to look at, either.” He glances off to the side, blushing furiously. “That’s why I got so upset back there. I figured you were just embarrassed about kissing me and that you were maybe spacing out around me because you liked me too, but then… then you totally blindsided me with all that talk about going back in time and I just… what the heck? It seemed like this wasn’t even important enough for you to take seriously. Like you could just brush it all off with a stupid joke and make fun of me. It made me mad because… I don’t know. I guess I was seriously starting to fall for you.”

If he could, Kageyama would’ve drowned himself in the nearest puddle. He _knew_ he should have listened to himself when he first felt he was doing something wrong. All this time he’s been too wrapped up in himself and his own worries to actually notice Hinata, and now the situation has become strange and warped and nothing like he imagined. He can’t go back and change things anymore but –

“Can I start over?” he blurts out, unable to stop himself.

Hinata’s eyes narrow in suspicion. “What do you mean?”

“Not like that,” Kageyama assures him. “I mean I’d like to start over so I can do this properly, now that I can’t do any of that stupid stuff. You know, like… maybe date you for real. If – if you want to.”

“Really –?”

“Yeah. Really.”

“Kageyama, I – I –”

Hinata abruptly cuts himself off, squints for a second, and then doubles over in a loud sneeze. The sound pierces through the awful weather like a whip and Kageyama feels as though he’s been snapped out of a trance. They’ve actually been standing out here in the rain for several minutes like a couple of fools. They’ll both get sick if they don’t get warm and dry soon. He promptly reaches out and grabs Hinata by the wrist.

“Come on.”

“Huh –? What?” Hinata stammers, stumbling in his tracks. “Where are we going?”

“You’re gonna catch a cold out here,” Kageyama says gruffly and leads the way without looking at him. “My place isn’t big but it’s a lot closer than yours.”

There’s a short pause, only filled by the splashing sound of Hinata’s skip-running steps.

“Alright... but at least slow down, you idiot! You have way longer legs than me!”

 

**

 

It’s a small blessing to finally enter his warm apartment. Kageyama drops his bag on the floor and starts peeling off his jacket, only now noticing how cold he truly is. He flicks the lights on and turns to Hinata, who’s lingering tentatively by the door.

“You can take a shower, if you want.”

Hinata fidgets with one of his wet sleeves, resembling a small, drenched animal. “What about you?”

“Don’t worry about me.”

“Um, if you say so… Don’t mind if I do, then.”

Kageyama pads into the apartment with soaked socks and rummages through his drawers, finding a set of clean clothes before awkwardly handing them to Hinata.

“These are all probably too big for you but… make the best of it, I guess?”

“Thank you.” Hinata accepts the clothes with a tiny smile. He opens his mouth as if to elaborate on something but then seems to change his mind. “So… okay. Excuse me.”

While Hinata showers, Kageyama changes into sweats and a t-shirt, dries his hair, and carefully drapes his wet clothes over the radiator. He’s in the middle of preparing tea when Hinata exits the bathroom and shuffles into the kitchen area. The basketball shorts are definitely too wide and long, reaching him well below the knees instead of above them, and the hoodie envelops him completely, having almost a shrinking effect. He keeps pushing the sleeves up only for them to roll relentlessly back down. There’s something oddly mesmerizing about seeing his oversized clothes on him and Kageyama tries not to steal too many glances.

“That was refreshing!” he says happily and sidles up to the kitchen counter. “Seriously, thanks so much, Kageyama! I hope it’s okay that I hung my clothes up in the bathroom. They should be dry in no time.”

“Of course.” Kageyama pushes a steaming cup of tea in his direction. “Here. It’s honey and ginger.”

Hinata accepts the drink, cradling the cup between his hands. He breathes in, wavers a little, turns halfheartedly as if to move but ends up staying there by the counter.

“Hey, uh, I’m sorry for asking you this really rude question… but you’re not like, crazy or anything – right? You’re not imagining all these things?”

Kageyama calmly twirls his spoon around in his cup, watching the tea bag dip up and down. All things considered, it’s a very reasonable question and he doesn’t take any offense in it. He can’t blame him for wanting to know. Had the situation been reversed he probably would’ve asked the same thing. Unfortunately it’s impossible to prove his answer, so whatever Kageyama says Hinata has no choice but to take his word for it.

“No, I’m not imagining things. It’s very much real.”

Hinata nods, staring into the depths of his tea. When he speaks again his words are careful and measured, like he’s been mentally preparing them.

“I’ve often felt a sense of déjà vu around you. I always thought that was a bit weird. Like, the first time I saw you I felt I’d already met you before – and I guess I actually had, in a way. It’s really remarkable, Kageyama, this thing you say you’re capable of. You’ve explained it and it kinda makes sense, but it’s hard to believe.”

Kageyama hesitates, unsure of what else he can say. Having Hinata there is not an easy thing to handle. They’re in such a small and private space right now, Hinata suddenly knows everything he’s done, and he can’t really tell what he’s thinking. It’s terrifying.

“I understand and I’m sorry,” he says, going for another apology. “I never should have turned back time around you as often as I did. I went ahead and changed your timeline without you knowing and that’s a pretty big deal. I don’t regret meeting you or becoming your friend, not at all. But I was being intrusive and rude and way too caught up in myself. That’s what I regret.”

Hinata just nods again, leaving a long-drawn pause. Then he smiles to himself, amused.

“I thought this over while I was in the shower just now,” he admits. “And honestly, I’ve been waiting for you to laugh at this. If you were joking you’d have to find it funny, right? Even if it would make you a jerk, I thought I’d be able to forgive you a lot faster if you were just kidding.”

He breaks off for a moment, tilts his head, turns the teacup around in his hands. This is all moving at an excruciatingly slow and careful pace and Kageyama’s heart is nothing but a drumroll in his ears, racing through a thousand beats per second.

“But obviously, this isn’t a laughing matter to you,” he continues. “You’ve been _so_ serious this whole time. When you came clean earlier I didn’t even notice how nervous you were, or how hard it was for you to speak. But I get it now. You opened up to me about something important and private and my response wasn’t what you deserved. So I’m sorry, too.”

The ceramic has turned lukewarm between Kageyama’s palms, and it dawns on him what these words actually mean. The impact is delayed but once it hits it has him mentally reeling. If he didn’t hang on to this one single mug of tea, which right now seems to be the most important mug of tea in the whole damn universe, he’s convinced he already would have buckled from sheer relief.

“In other words, I believe all of that crazy stuff you said,” Hinata grins, the change in his mood instant. He lightly bumps his shoulder against his arm. “And weirdly enough I still like you.”

Kageyama stares at him in both surprise and amazement and only now does he notice how close Hinata is standing. He can feel the warmth radiating from his body, could count every freckle on his face if he wanted to. He doesn’t know what he should say to express how he feels right now, but his body has at least decided what to _do_ and is seemingly moving on its own. Hinata reaches up on his tiptoes to meet him, his gaze locked on Kageyama’s lips – and in the next moment he squeezes his eyes shut, scrunches his nose up, and quickly buries his face in the crook of his arm where he sneezes twice in a row.

The mortification that follows is palpable for the both of them. Blushing wildly, Kageyama grabs Hinata by the shoulders, whirls him away from the kitchen counter, and shoves him towards the couch.

“I told you, don’t get sick,” he grumbles as he wraps him up in a blanket. “Now sit still. I’ll make you a new cup of tea.”

When he returns Hinata has fallen soundly asleep, lights out for real. He sags to the side, mouth dropped open in a silent snore, his cheeks flushed. He looks too peaceful to wake so Kageyama finds a pillow, carefully nudges and encourages him into lying down, and then tucks him in properly. Hinata cuddles softly into his cocoon of blankets, looking perfectly huggable with his fluffy hair falling into his face, and Kageyama’s chest hurts only a little.

He gets ready for bed as quietly as he can, tiptoeing around the tiny apartment as he stores away the table, gets the futon out, and turns the lights off. Hinata hasn’t moved an inch in the meantime, his head a bright beacon even in the semi-darkness. Kageyama hides his face in his blanket and bites back a happy smile.

“Dumbass,” he mutters under his breath, feeling all light and warm inside.

 

**

 

Kageyama wakes up the next morning to fragments of a vague but peaceful dream. He flops over on his side, turning his groggy thoughts over in his mind. He pieces together lingering images of heavy rain, soaked clothes, a cup of tea, a sleeping bundle curled up on his couch –

A noise from the kitchen reaches through to him and Kageyama’s thoughts come to an abrupt stop.

_Hinata._

For a muddled moment he’d actually forgotten all about him. He remains still for a couple of minutes longer, wide-awake, and stares at the opposite wall. He listens to the simmering of pans, the clatter of plates and bowls, and Hinata humming a nondescript tune in the midst of everything. Then the delicious smell of food finally registers in Kageyama’s brain and his empty stomach reacts accordingly. He realizes he can’t stay under his blanket forever. He takes a deep, steadying breath and sits up.

Hinata’s morning hair is even more unruly than usual, curly locks sticking in all directions. He’s still wearing the borrowed clothes he slept in and he keeps shaking his hands free of the long sleeves. He’s moving deftly even around the cramped kitchen area, peeking under lids and sampling a taste where needed. In the end he turns around, holding a pan of grilled fish in one hand and a spatula in the other, and he lights up when he sees Kageyama awake.

“Good morning! You’re an early riser, it’s barely eight o’clock.”

Kageyama stretches his arms above his head and yawns widely. “I can go to back to sleep if you want, it’s no problem.”

“Too late now, breakfast’s ready!” Hinata smiles and waves him over. “I hope you don’t mind me making myself at home in your kitchen.”

“Not at all…” Kageyama settles down at the table, taking in the sight of steaming hot rice, omelet, salmon, and miso soup. “You seem to be a pretty capable cook,” he comments, as Hinata completes the breakfast table with a pot of tea.

“It was easy, you have a well-stocked fridge. Like, it’s literally a textbook example. You really are a sports health student.”

“So you didn’t catch a cold overnight?”

Hinata just waves his question away. “Nah, all I needed was a good night’s sleep! Thanks for letting me stay over, by the way,” he adds sheepishly. “I ended up falling asleep on your couch, sorry. I was exhausted.”

“Don’t worry about it, seriously,” Kageyama says. He hesitates, rubs at his neck. “I… I’m happy to have you here, so…”

There’s a somewhat tense moment of silence where they just stare at each other from across the table. It strikes him how much this image of them actually presents them as a couple, just two people living a life together where these kinds of early mornings are perfectly normal. It also looks a lot like they woke up to the awkward morning after, especially since Hinata is wearing his clothes. They quickly break eye contact, blushing at the same time. Kageyama gets the feeling they were both thinking the same thing.

“Alright, then!” Though clearly embarrassed, Hinata does his best at guiding the moment back to normal and claps his palms together. “Please dig in!”

Everything tastes as delicious as it looks, which for some reason only makes Kageyama’s ears burn even more. Things feel near perfect like this and he has no idea how to handle it. Maybe this feeling only exists here, at breakfast, in this particular beam of early sunlight and in this particular Sunday space. It feels right but also a bit new and fragile and fleeting, and he can’t be too sure that it won’t dissolve and disappear once he says ‘thanks for the meal’.

“So,” Hinata says through a mouthful of rice, “what are we doing today?”

The question almost has Kageyama choking on his soup.

“Uh – what?”

“Well, it’s the weekend, my clothes are dry, and it stopped raining so I thought… if you didn’t have anything planned already maybe we could… you know, go do something… together.” He pauses, picking at his food with his chopsticks. “And… yesterday you did say you wanted to date me, so if the offer still stands… But it doesn’t have to be super serious or anything!” he adds quickly and looks up again, eyes bright and cheeks red. “Let’s just hang out, okay?”

Kageyama has never dated anybody before and he isn’t sure if Hinata has, either, but that good feeling he had at breakfast sticks with him throughout the whole day. They’re not even doing anything special. They enjoy the last days of the cherry blossoms at the nearest park, before grabbing lunch at a burger restaurant. Later in the afternoon they hit an arcade where Kageyama manages to win a stuffed toy from a claw machine game. He gives the prize to Hinata, who responds with the most delightful enthusiasm, the kind that melts your heart and boosts your confidence at the same time.

At least they’re hanging out, like they set out to do, and Hinata is amazing company. As always he’s great to talk to, easy to laugh with, and Kageyama has no strange powers to worry about. He hopes it went out there into the void somewhere and ceased to exist, whatever it was. Right now he’s happy knowing he can let things come at him the way they are and that he can’t do much about it, other than being himself. Certain things are out of his hands and that’s fine.

They haven’t really followed through on their confessions, though. Ever since yesterday it has hovered in the air, a state of ‘almost’ constantly interrupting their chemistry, and it’s getting annoying. Kageyama thinks it’s time to actually try and bridge the gap, if he ever wants to get anywhere with Hinata.

He gestures at an open sports shop. “Can we check this place out?”

“You need new gear?” Hinata asks as Kageyama grabs the nearest volleyball on display and twirls it in his hands, checking it for air.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

He lets Hinata browse for a bit, pays for the volleyball, and then nods in direction of the park.

“Let’s head on over there.”

“For what?”

“For volleyball.”

Hinata frowns at him. “You mean to watch?”

“I mean to play,” Kageyama replies with a grin, and he swears the change in Hinata’s expression is so bright and brilliant it could challenge the sun.

It’s evident that Hinata played a fair bit of volleyball in high school. He doesn’t have game sense as much as he’s naturally talented, but it’s supported by a competitive spirit and great physical ability. He has plenty of potential and his jump is insane, almost catching Kageyama completely off guard at first. At the same time, he can see why he quit. His height is already working against him and it didn’t seem like his team did much to help him develop his full potential. He could have been an amazing player, in Kageyama’s opinion. He wishes he’d known him three or four years ago. Maybe in another lifetime, or in another universe, things are much different.

“Wow, you’re awesome, Kageyama!” Hinata exclaims, eyes glowing. He looks at his palm, which has turned a healthy, stinging red. “You’re so accurate it’s almost scary!”

“Good for me,” Kageyama mutters and turns away to hide his smile, “because you kinda suck.”

“Hey!” Hinata glares, pretending to be offended. “That’s not a very nice thing to say to your date!”

Kageyama leans down to pick up the ball when a sudden sting of pain shoots through his shoulder, effectively stopping him in his tracks. He inhales sharply and rubs at the sore spot, flexing his arm a couple of times in an attempt to get rid of the tension.

“What’s wrong?” Hinata shows up next to him and peers at his face, concerned. “Does it hurt?”

“It’s fine, I think.” Kageyama rolls his shoulder cautiously. “It’s just acting up.”

“Let’s call it a day,” Hinata suggests and gently pats his back. “Just to be safe, okay?”

They pack up their things in silence. Sunday afternoon fades into evening and the sun is slowly setting, wrapping the surrounding buildings up in a hazy golden glow. Once they’re ready to go home Hinata shoulders his bag and frowns at him, deep in thought.

“Hey, I’ve been wondering… Why didn’t you go back in time to avoid your injury?”

Kageyama stills for a second. His hands, busy spinning the volleyball, also come to a stop. He looks up and squints against the melting sunset. His shoulder injury is complicated in all its simplicity, and it’s something that has proved itself to be more powerful and final than his time traveling abilities. The reason and decision behind it is something he has kept entirely to himself, and all of a sudden he feels vulnerable.

“I could only travel back thirty minutes at a time, tops,” he explains. “And I sustained that injury gradually, over a very long period. Once the injury was a fact, I’d ignored it and allowed it to develop for months already. I couldn’t do anything to change it.”

He pauses, bounces the ball once, twice, and shrugs at the grassy ground.

“Long story short, I practiced too much, too recklessly, and I wouldn’t listen to anyone. I was an arrogant brat who thought he was invincible – and I ended up overexerting myself. I had surgery, it was unsuccessful, and then the damage was done. Turning back time was useless.”

Kageyama keeps his focus on the volleyball between his hands, as if to fend off his own emotions. It’s strange and kind of nerve-wracking to talk about his injury but it’s also surprisingly easy, like it’s meant to be that way. Hinata hasn’t offered any comments yet but his silence somehow holds a deep understanding that Kageyama appreciates, so he continues.

“The time I spent in recovery got me thinking a lot. An injury does not only affect me but also the entire team. If I can’t take care of myself and keep myself injury free then I’m not really deserving of the court, am I? I’ll always be holding someone else back. So even if I could avoid it by turning back time, I don’t think I would have done it. I know it’s easy to say that now but… some things you aren’t cut out for after all, I guess. You just gotta make peace with that.”

A sudden choked-up noise forces Kageyama to look up and he finds Hinata looking back at him, positively in tears. He immediately drops the volleyball and reaches out, roughly wiping his cheeks with his sleeve.

“It’s nothing to cry over, dumbass!” he grumbles, not wanting to give away how touched he actually is. “ _I’m_ the one who should be sad, not you!”

“I wish I’d known about this from the start,” Hinata sniffles, his voice thick. “I mean, you’re so good the way you are, Kageyama – you really are such an amazing guy. You sharing that with me just proves it even more. No wonder I wanted to be friends with you from the get-go.”

“To be fair you wanna be friends with everyone,” Kageyama points out and dares a half-smile.

“That’s true…” Hinata looks up, tiny teardrops still clinging to his lashes, framing his warm eyes. “But I don’t wanna kiss everyone.”

Kageyama swallows, heat spreading rapidly from his ears to the rest of his face. He kind of wishes he were still holding the volleyball. It always used to give him a confidence boost, the opportunity to hide behind his sport, but that wouldn’t work with Hinata anyway. He’s too much of a force of nature to hide from. Kageyama thinks about the gap he wanted to bridge, and how he literally only needs to take one more step to do it – and then he doesn’t really think any further before he leans down and kisses him.

It’s the kiss he’s been waiting for without actually expecting it to ever happen. It’s almost unbelievable that all his failures took a correct turn somewhere and led him here, to this moment where Hinata’s warm body is pressed up against him. His arms are wrapped tightly around his waist and his soft lips are encouraging, searching. It feels right and familiar and Kageyama forgets that they’re on full display at the park, with joggers and dog walkers passing them.

When they break apart it’s like time has stopped existing altogether. Instead of rewinding and adjusting, with minutes and seconds forcefully rearranged, time has turned into something Kageyama doesn’t need or even cares about anymore.

He brushes his thumb over Hinata’s cheek. “That’s definitely something I’d turn back time for.”

“You don’t have to; we can just do it again, as many times as you want!” Hinata grins widely and grabs his hand, lacing their fingers together. “Let’s go back, okay? I wanna order pizza and watch a movie with you!”

Those words find their way directly to Kageyama’s heart, giving it a squeeze. He definitely likes this definition of ‘going back’ better.

 

**

 

“Yesss!”

“Noooo!!!”

Kageyama raises both arms in victory as his video game character jumps in celebration, colorful stars and fireworks erupting on the screen. Next to him Hinata slumps and falls over with an annoyed groan, one hand in a fist around his controller and the other covering his eyes in defeat.

“I don’t understand!” he whines. “I _always_ beat you at this game, without fail!”

“Wrong, you failed this time,” Kageyama corrects him smugly. “Or maybe I was just too superior for you. However you wanna look at it: you lost.”

Hinata sits up and glares at him. “Again,” he insists, waving his controller in Kageyama’s face. “I want a rematch!”

“What? Hell no!”

“Why not?! I totally gave you lots of second chances before!”

“That’s because you’d already played it a bunch of times while I hadn’t, dumbass!”

“Respect your senpai, you brat! Give me a rematch!”

“ _No_ ,” Kageyama repeats and snatches the controller out of his hand.

“Hey!” Hinata shuffles towards him on his knees, arms already reaching for Kageyama’s hands, his face scrunched up in a small indignant pout. “Give that back!”

Kageyama tosses the controller to the side, too far for either of them to reach, and wraps both arms around Hinata’s waist. They quickly lose balance, rolling over on the floor, and Kageyama grabs the opportunity to lock a squirming and swearing Hinata in a firm grip. In the end Hinata huffs and relaxes on top of him, warm and heavy.

“Let’s play it again,” he sulks and rests his chin on Kageyama’s chest, peering up at him with big, soft puppy eyes. “Please?”

“I don’t know, Shouyou,” Kageyama sighs, pretending his boyfriend’s change of strategy is completely lost on him. He fakes a yawn and drops his voice into a bored drawl. “I have to say you’re not very persuasive...”

Not the type to get discouraged so fast, Hinata opts for a different game plan. He adjusts for a better position, straddles Kageyama’s waist, and leans down to plant a determined kiss on his lips.

“Please.”

“That was way too quick,” Kageyama teases. “I didn’t even feel that.”

With an annoyed eye roll, Hinata leans down to kiss him again. This time it lasts long enough for Kageyama to catch the citrusy scent of his shampoo, for his hands to find purchase in his unruly hair, for his mind to go momentarily blank against the velvety, slow movements of his lips.

“Just one more try, Tobio,” he murmurs when they disconnect, nuzzling his temple.

“Weird,” Kageyama sighs, allowing his hands to wander past Hinata’s shoulders and further down his back, before coming to a rest at his hips. “That used to be my line.”

Hinata stops moving and pulls back a little, gazing down at him with searching eyes. Suddenly the moment isn’t about the video game anymore and they both know it.

“And? You think it’s still your line, even now?”

Kageyama contemplates that question, which is both pointless and a bit frightening at the same time. Months have already passed and things have definitely changed for the absolute best, but every once in a while those faint ‘what if’s appear in the back of his mind, floating in and out of his thoughts. He nods, takes a deep breath, and closes his eyes.

One more try, then – just for the sake of a challenge.

He counts backwards from five, slowly and deliberately, his entire being focused on those simple numbers, his mind trying to draw as much attention to itself as possible. If the universe is really eavesdropping then it should pay attention now. He reaches zero with a sense of calm finality and opens his eyes again to something that feels pretty safe and ordinary. The clock on the wall is still ticking, the end game results are still flashing at them from the TV-screen, his character is still dancing, and Hinata is still hovering over him with an expectant look on his face.

Things are, in many ways, _still_.

“You okay?” Hinata asks, his voice hushed. “I’m pretty sure we didn’t go back in time, not even a second.”

“We didn’t,” Kageyama agrees with a smile. He reaches up to brush a wayward lock of bright red hair out of Hinata’s face. “We’re still right here.”

**Author's Note:**

> Every time you have a sense of déjà vu or you feel like you’ve seen a person before, you know that someone with a casual time-rewinding ability has been on their bullshit again.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this, clichés and all! Please let me know if you did! I actually had a lot of fun writing it but I didn’t expect it to turn out so lengthy, yikes… Anyway, thanks so much for reading, I appreciate it!
> 
> Title taken from [this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzBWjOflTKw) by Ina Wroldsen, just because that one line was so perfect. The rest of the lyrics don’t fit this story at all but it’s still a beautiful song so I recommend checking it out anyway!
> 
> Feel free to talk to me on twitter [@tsun_derei](https://twitter.com/tsun_derei)!


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